Outstanding

Wobble, another reason to love my iPhone…

…although I could have done without “the one for the ladies”.

Taking A Shit 2.0

Because Taking the Paper to the Can is So 1900’s
Guidelines for Growlers in the Digital World
Taking Your Podcasts to the Public Pooper

1) Be Proud – Don’t hide your “player” in your pocket. Grab it with pride and hold your head high on your way to dominate, earbuds a blazin’.

2) Assume the Position – There is no need to mess with your junk during pre-game. Safely take your seat and THEN let the entertainment begin. I pity the fool who drops their hardware in the toilet. How are you going to explain that one?

3) Volume Control – Adjust your volume so that it is loud enough that you can’t hear the heavy breathing, grunting, or “plops” coming from the neighboring stalls, but not so loud that they can hear what you are listening to. If it’s annoying on the subway, it’s going to be annoying in the shitter.

3) Laughter – No matter how hilarious the media you are consuming is, thou shall not laugh. That’s just creepy to hear, be courteous.

4) Keep it Clean – This is NOT “boner-time”. Need I say more?

5) Fecal Matter – Inevitably you’re going to have to wipe. As much of a multi-tasker as you are, under no circumstances are you to commence wipage without first pausing your podcast and securing your “player” in the safety of your pocket.

* this is a work in progress, please comment with your number two cents *